FOR LOVE NOR MONEY: BRITS WAIT 18 MONTHS BEFORE TALKING TO A NEW PARTNER ABOUT FINANCES

Brits are more comfortable opening up about previous relationships with a new partner than their financial history, reveals new research1 from Capital One UK.

Adults will discuss past relationships on average within 11 months of dating someone new, but it takes them 18 months to open up about their finances including details on how much they’ve saved and what they owe.

There are signs younger generations are getting better at being more open about relationships and money.

Gen Z (18-25) will discuss their relationship history within 10 months with a new partner which is a full two months before millennials (26-40). They are also more open about money and will discuss it two months earlier (one year, four months) than average.

The research shows being open about finances could be good for relationships, as nearly two thirds (65%) rate how good someone is with money as a key factor when choosing who to date. Financial acumen is second only to personality (86%) in dating characteristics for prospective partners and close in importance to someone’s relationship with their family (63%). In comparison, someone’s dating history is important to fewer than half (47%) of people when selecting a new partner.

Table one: Factors which influence someone choosing who to date

Factor

Percentage of people who rate this as important

Their personality

86%

How good with money they are

65%

Their relationship with their family

63%

Their dating/sexual history

47%

Where they live

46%

How much money they earn

33%

How much money they have saved / their assets

32%

Source: Capital One UK, 2022

Embarrassment over finances may explain why so many people avoid discussing money. Just half (49%) of Brits overall are happy with their financial history, and this falls to 31% of Gen Z, the lowest of any generation. In comparison, 45% of millennials were happy with their financial history.

Awkwardness about discussing money isn’t just for new couples, the research found. Almost half (45%) of adults in established relationships admitted they feel uncomfortable discussing finances.

This is perhaps highlighted by how just a third (34%) of those in relationships have a joint bank account and only a fifth (21%) regularly set out a budget plan with their partner. Top reasons for the lack of communication on finances include it not being a topic which comes to mind (13%), not wanting to make their partner feel bad (9%) and embarrassment over finances (9%).

Lack of openness over finances goes wider than just not talking about it. One in seven (14%) have hidden at least one purchase from their partner, one in 10 (10%) would happily be in a relationship with someone and know nothing about their finances and one in 20 (5%) don’t know their partner’s salary. Younger people are more likely to hide purchases from their partner; a fifth (19%) of Gen Z have hidden spending, compared to just 12% of the over 40s.

Katy Lomax, Chief Experience Officer at Capital One UK said: “It’s interesting that data shows that money is so much harder to talk about than relationships, and how the UK sees it as a bit of a ‘taboo’ subject. It can be tricky to know when the best time is to discuss your financial history with a new partner, but while it is sensible to be cautious about who you talk to about your money, the topic should be discussed more readily.

“It’s important that people are more open about their finances, especially when it comes to how they can work together with their partner to achieve their financial ambitions. It’s also important to enter into joint financial agreements, like bank accounts and mortgages, with full transparency as that link between you and your partner could have positive or negative implications for your financial future, such as your credit score, long-term.”